LECTURE LIVE

[rugpull]

Who: Idols of all sorts
Where: Hotel Lobby
When: Day 476, morning

[some new idol, some idiot hyena furry idk. He's from Pep Pep? And he's hitting the live button and--]

HEY idols m'new here and the first order of business is t'make some cash so here it is. My name is Shandy cuz why the heck not I guess and this is m'lecture live. And my lecture is this--apparently some of you guys wake up in the morning, slam a clown nose on yer face with a resounding honk, and choose death not cuz of I GUESS WE PLAY DEATH GAMES HERE BY FORCE but cuz death games ya just WANNA do? You just WANNA fight to the death and then apparently I GUESS m'unit glues ya back together?

I dunno, man. I just got here and seems like necromancy is on the menu. So don't just go dyin' on people for laughs and pride.

Unless ya got a big ol' tip waiting for the Pep servicin' ya! In which case call on me and this Shandy'll be right there to help out all the well paying clowns without a single comment about how much yer clown makeup is running down yer face.

Be generous or else uh.

[checks phone for live info notes, squinting]

I dunno, I'll "discipline" ya. Bite ya maybe.

Class now open for questions and I'm now open for preemptive payments into the I Might Die For Clown Reasons fund. Generous payment will be remembered!

Comments

[doublefried]

Do you just want money? I can just give you money.

[rugpull]

He saw right through me.

[doublefried]

I don't make clown decisions, but I am a philanthropist.

[rugpull]

I'll take the dough you generously say ya don't knead.

[doublefried]

Whatcha need? Five? Ten?

[rugpull]

How much ya got?

[tail slowly wagging]

[doublefried]

Well, I wanna keep SOME in reserve.

[ transferring 5k points welcome to imeeji bro ]

[rugpull]

I'll never forget ya and yer beautiful wingspan, wizard man.

[doublefried]

Unless you get amnesia again. I'm W!

[rugpull]

Awesome, W. Should I consider this a down payment on yer team or are there others ya wanna cover?

[doublefried]

There's a guy about your age with red hair on avante, I wanna cover him too.

[rugpull]

Consider it done! He has been taken under yer wing and also mine now I GUESS.

[doublefried]

He's generally a pretty smart kid, but things happen.

[rugpull]

Got his hand brushing that rubber nose on occasion?

[doublefried]

We all don the nose in our time, willingly or not.

[rugpull]

Not me, m'gonna stay far away from murder clown activities.

[doublefried]

Do your best!

[rugpull]

M'ears are highly tuned to listen for the telltale honks and squeaks.

[doublefried]

Oh, you'll hear 'em from miles away. You got a name, new pep?

[rugpull]

Shandy!

[doublefried]

Shandy! Welcome to Imeeji, Shandy.

[rugpull]

Thanks! Heard its uh a real blast out here!

[doublefried]

Oh, it's mostly fine.

[rugpull]

...that so?

[doublefried]

Like, you occasionally get the shit kicked outta ya, sure. But it's usually in very specific situations that you'll definitely know when you see 'em. Roaming murderers are nearly extinct.