Live triple threat!

[unskippablecutscene]

Who: Cosmo, Marnie, the Grand Master of Ceremonies Ligrev, and you!
Where: the lobby
When: Day 244 noon

[It’s the lobby, there’s like, not much special going on, but Vergil is in a big robe and pointy hat and false beard obscuring himself as much as possible. The massive size of the beard helps muffle his voice a bit too. Marnie is just hanging out nursing a drink, basically. Cosmo has set up a table of drinks.]

Good morning/afternoon/evening, please set all cellular devices to silent during the ceremony or they will be confiscated. ...Good enough? [HE IS SO UNCOMFORTABLE the disguise was not enough.]

Marriage! Fuckin' cute, right? Choosing someone to be bound to for life! Ain't nothin' more romantic, if you're into it! And if you're not, well, we're just fuckin' around, so no worries there. But we've got a theme to pander to, so let's have some fun!

[What we have here is actually a man who is terrible at monologuing. Does he get points for effort?]

[Cosmo raises a glass of champagne in a toast.]

Thank you Ligrev, Grand Master of Ceremonies! Thank you Marnie! We should work on a title for you shouldn’t we.

And with all that said, anyone who comes by now can marry one of these three eligible* bachelors**! Just point at your choice and the other two will see the wedding done… Somehow or other. Personally I recommend Ligrev, a serious older gentleman with a distinguished aura. Then again, if eye-candy is your thing you can’t beat Marnie. Naturally I, Cosmo, am a catch.

Of course you can bring your own bride or groom if you like, too.

Well, who will come get married?

*Citation needed
**Citation needed

[Ligrev starts to back away from the scene the moment they’re all offered as possibly eligible possibly bachelors. Hopefully no one will notice if they’re distracted. This was not part of the deal.]

((Zreal, Baritones, and Taisho get host bonus, all participants get theme bonus + 3 host bonus, come bully Vergil or get hitched what happens in hell stays in hell))

Comments

[rollplayinghouse]

Is that creepier than marrying someone and not being invested? What if someone falls for you on first sight?

[crimeson]

I mean none of us are actually qualified to run a marriage, pretty sure. And if someone fell for me at first sight they'd still have to actually communicate that? These are jokes.

[rollplayinghouse]

...I was also joking.

[crimeson]

...Fair.

[rollplayinghouse]

[...]

Sorry. I can be pretty hard to read, sometimes.

[crimeson]

I am also uhhh, kinda dumb. So. I'll get used to it.

[rollplayinghouse]

[gives him an evaluating look]

If you say so.

[crimeson]

[makes. a face.]

I guess "dense" is more honest. Sorry. M'not tryin' to lie, I just...

[handwave]

[rollplayinghouse]

...No, I get it. There are just different kinds of dumb.

It's fine as long as you don't mind me being really blunt sometimes.

[crimeson]

I don't mind blunt at all.

[rollplayinghouse]

Then it's fine.

[crimeson]

Glad to hear it.

[rollplayinghouse]

[huffs]

Anyway, I see you're jumping right back into things. Did you catch up with Baritones?

[crimeson]

Yeah, I visited them yesterday. Brought back some food that's in the fridge right now, in fact.

[rollplayinghouse]

Everything went okay...?

[crimeson]

[blinks]

Yeah, it was fine. They mostly seemed kinda bummed about the whole thing, but no one was mad or anythin'.

[rollplayinghouse]

...That's good.

I talked to Ruby a little, about if our units could have a better relationship... I still don't know how well that will go over with the others, but maybe it's something.

[crimeson]

...It's already pretty nice to hear you're for it. I dunno if it'll work out, but... I'll keep my fingers crossed.

[rollplayinghouse]

We'll see.