unskippablecutscene: (ffxiv_21022019_163601_921)
Handsome Stranger ([personal profile] unskippablecutscene) wrote in [community profile] imeeji_frontstage2020-05-28 07:23 pm

Live triple threat!

Who: Cosmo, Marnie, the Grand Master of Ceremonies Ligrev, and you!
Where: the lobby
When: Day 244 noon

[It’s the lobby, there’s like, not much special going on, but Vergil is in a big robe and pointy hat and false beard obscuring himself as much as possible. The massive size of the beard helps muffle his voice a bit too. Marnie is just hanging out nursing a drink, basically. Cosmo has set up a table of drinks.]

Good morning/afternoon/evening, please set all cellular devices to silent during the ceremony or they will be confiscated. ...Good enough? [HE IS SO UNCOMFORTABLE the disguise was not enough.]

Marriage! Fuckin' cute, right? Choosing someone to be bound to for life! Ain't nothin' more romantic, if you're into it! And if you're not, well, we're just fuckin' around, so no worries there. But we've got a theme to pander to, so let's have some fun!

[What we have here is actually a man who is terrible at monologuing. Does he get points for effort?]

[Cosmo raises a glass of champagne in a toast.]

Thank you Ligrev, Grand Master of Ceremonies! Thank you Marnie! We should work on a title for you shouldn’t we.

And with all that said, anyone who comes by now can marry one of these three eligible* bachelors**! Just point at your choice and the other two will see the wedding done… Somehow or other. Personally I recommend Ligrev, a serious older gentleman with a distinguished aura. Then again, if eye-candy is your thing you can’t beat Marnie. Naturally I, Cosmo, am a catch.

Of course you can bring your own bride or groom if you like, too.

Well, who will come get married?

*Citation needed
**Citation needed


[Ligrev starts to back away from the scene the moment they’re all offered as possibly eligible possibly bachelors. Hopefully no one will notice if they’re distracted. This was not part of the deal.]

((Zreal, Baritones, and Taisho get host bonus, all participants get theme bonus + 3 host bonus, come bully Vergil or get hitched what happens in hell stays in hell))
crimeson: (how slow that trap closes)

[personal profile] crimeson 2020-05-29 03:17 am (UTC)(link)
Might as well, right?

Turns out I kind of suck at rambling, though.
avestan: The head, exactly, it’s got all the face and stuff on it. (What’s the best part of the dog?)

[personal profile] avestan 2020-05-29 03:19 am (UTC)(link)
Well, you know what they say. Practice makes perfect.
crimeson: (i'm sorry mother)

[personal profile] crimeson 2020-05-29 03:24 am (UTC)(link)
Guess I gotta start somewhere!
avestan: (Just a dirty boy.)

[personal profile] avestan 2020-05-29 03:45 am (UTC)(link)
Sure do.

Any offers for your hand yet?
crimeson: (you'll take the west train)

[personal profile] crimeson 2020-05-29 03:51 am (UTC)(link)
Nope! I'm kinda heartbroken.
avestan: (I can... I CAN DIE!!)

[personal profile] avestan 2020-05-29 03:56 am (UTC)(link)
Guess you just can't compete with Ligrev.
crimeson: (for an underrated writer- overrated rapp)

[personal profile] crimeson 2020-05-29 04:02 am (UTC)(link)
I suppose I will just have to accept my inferiority...!
avestan: he can't constantly attack? (Should you make it so)

[personal profile] avestan 2020-05-29 04:05 am (UTC)(link)
It's not like any of us could measure up to that beard.
crimeson: (believe me when i say)

[personal profile] crimeson 2020-05-29 04:10 am (UTC)(link)
I'm years behind on growing something so majestic. It just isn't to be.
avestan: O, cast out these spirits! (I've been bedeviled! You're bedevilin' m)

[personal profile] avestan 2020-05-29 07:13 am (UTC)(link)
It's now your mission to grow a beard. You've gotta try.
crimeson: (snow falls fast and thin)

[personal profile] crimeson 2020-05-29 07:19 am (UTC)(link)
...How is it trying, all I gotta do is stop shaving?

[all the older dudes in his family have beards, he totally can.]
avestan: (I've got a weird black hand on my chin.)

[personal profile] avestan 2020-05-29 07:59 am (UTC)(link)
Is that so? It'd be a lot harder for some of us.
crimeson: (further from our origin)

[personal profile] crimeson 2020-05-29 08:10 am (UTC)(link)
I mean I guess I'd want to keep it neat, but other than that... My uncle's got a hell of a beard.
avestan: (sounds stupid)

[personal profile] avestan 2020-05-29 08:23 am (UTC)(link)
Then as your senpai on ☆ZRAEL I order you to start growing it out immediately.
crimeson: (another lie from the front lines)

[personal profile] crimeson 2020-05-29 08:24 am (UTC)(link)
But my youthful good looks!
avestan: (I can... I CAN DIE!!)

[personal profile] avestan 2020-05-29 08:26 am (UTC)(link)
Say goodbye to those. You'll be a mature manly man from now on.
crimeson: (snow falls fast and thin)

[personal profile] crimeson 2020-05-29 08:33 am (UTC)(link)
Noooo my pretty face....
avestan: But I'm confused and scared by the look and I'm worried about the look. (I fucking love this look.)

[personal profile] avestan 2020-05-29 08:34 am (UTC)(link)
[pats his cheek]

Sometimes you have to make sacrifices.
crimeson: (and when i lost you)

[personal profile] crimeson 2020-05-29 08:36 am (UTC)(link)
[leans. into patting.

who's touch starved? not this guy! nope.]

I guess I'll have to live with it.
avestan: (what is where and how is who.)

[personal profile] avestan 2020-05-29 08:52 am (UTC)(link)
[raises eyebrows because wow buddy]

...By the way. You and Ruler are friends, right?
crimeson: (the sun can't shine)

[personal profile] crimeson 2020-05-29 08:58 am (UTC)(link)
[shut up he's one of yours now be nice]

Ruler?
avestan: (Google "Shrek no clothes".)

[personal profile] avestan 2020-05-29 09:00 am (UTC)(link)
Lucifel.

[points at him]
crimeson: (we could barely hold it in)

[personal profile] crimeson 2020-05-29 09:01 am (UTC)(link)
Oh! I didn't know he also went by Ruler. Yeah, we get along.
avestan: (And you get wished into nonexistence)

[personal profile] avestan 2020-05-29 09:04 am (UTC)(link)
I'm pretty much the only one here who calls him that. He's the groom I mentioned earlier.
crimeson: (you said yourself fantastically)

[personal profile] crimeson 2020-05-29 09:06 am (UTC)(link)
--Hey, congrats, he showed up! Sorry this isn't legitimate like... at all.

[yeah he's zero percent threatened.]

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