imeeji_frontstage | Hell Bachelor: The Revenge

Who: Y’all
Where: Lobby
When: Day 150 around sunset

[The lobby has been set up today for a ~very special viewing~. The chairs are pulled around to face one of the TV screens, there’s glasses and water set aside for a BARiTONES style refreshment stand, and some helpful information cards have been set out for participants to get up to speed. The screen is showing someone’s shakycam recording of none other than Mars’ terrible Hell Bachelor stint, currently zoomed in to a tearful angel-looking demon (that's Velly by the by, fan favorite).

At the front stands Intensity (with all his limbs even and in this this suit), and with him Kohime -- wearing an Avante jacket swapped out for a BARiTONES blazer -- perched on a nearby table top with her legs crossed, close to Intensity.]

I do so hate leaving unfinished business.

[With a wide dramatic wave of his arm:]

Ladies and Gentleman, we present to you today the rare opportunity to provide closure to one of the poor, despondent idols in our midst. Mars, while returned to his paladin tribe, left behind six unfinished episodes, a score of broken hearts, ridiculous amounts of blackmail merchandise, and a decision yet unmade.

Who was to accept the final rose?

But it need not end this way. Our undercover agents have recovered video evidence of the life he left behind. And so, my challenge to you is this: since MidBoss was so reluctant to throw down the gauntlet, then we can make that decision for him. Review the contestants and make a pitch for the demon mistress of your choice.

May the best bachelorette win.

[Then, directed off-camera:] Can we get a pep in here for tallying?

[Meanwhile, Kohime slides forward to lean impertinently on Intensity, and adds:] Drinks on me.

((Debate/booze double Live! Come make bank by embarrassing Mars.

List of eligible bachelorettes here))

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

And he said no one would probably be able to get the tapes. I knew he was wrong.

He constantly underestimates my unit.

A mistake, clearly.

Clearly.

It's the nice ones that always have the ace up their sleeve.

I think there's a saying about the nice ones or something. I don't know, I couldn't be bothered to learn it. Anyway, about these contestants.

All terrible, honestly. It seems like they've all just made it this far for the obvious reason of they make good TV. It doesn't matter which one will win, because day into whatever the fuck happens post show they'll be an explosive split they can cash in on for the reunion.

Anyway, I probably have to pick to get the points, so I'll~ go~ with~ Velvet and Draven hooking up over their mutual crazy and love of potentially wanting to do Mars in.

[Tilts his head considering.

While she's not entirely incorrect...]

Do this bad end pull in Mars for a threesome for the finale?

Sure, why not, nobody will see it coming.

[ ayyyyyyyyyy. ]

Mars especially. Which is the most important part.

He'd probably do fine as a kept man.

You sure are enjoying this, huh?

Anyway, who are you banking on? I already cast my vote, so what’s yours?

Velvet, of course. Dedication is the key.

Though I am not opposed to an ending where Draven is thrown into the mix.

It's settled then. [ bangs imaginary gavel. ] Mars sandwich.

I do hope he likes being of the grilled variety.

He prefers smoked.

[ get it. haha. ]

(no subject)

bluescreenwhitedragon - 2019-09-08 23:59 (UTC) - Expand

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Eh, technically I think someone recorded it on their phone-thing.

Basically the same thing. GG.

You gonna play along? I mean, we're just here so "loverboy" makes all kinds of stupid annoyed faces, but if you wanna earn actual points it takes a little more than that.

I know, I know, I think I told Intensity I think all of the potential bachelorettes suck, and no matter which makes it to the end the eventual break up is going to spawn one hell of a renunion show.

Anyway. Velvet, I think, is the one that's going to make it to the end.

[She added Intensity as an option courtesy of B tho.]

Well he followed us home, so the Hells will never know.

[ snorts. ]

I'm sure they suckered somebody else in to finished up the season. Maybe they even made them dress up like Mars. Now wouldn't that be hilarious.

Hah! Might be an improvement.

Am I getting you a drink, since you've dropped by?

Depends on whether they were with half the looks and double the personality or double the looks and half the personality. Both have their pros and cons.

Anyway~ sure. Give me something strong. I'm going to need it to get through this trainwreck. [ vague motions to intensity and mars' pissing contest. ]

Oh man, what are you even complaining about? You didn't spend an entire mission with the two of them!

[Obligingly makes her a drink -- it's technically a shot, enough to equal three, Liquid Cocaine (jagermeister, goldschlager, and peppermint schnapps).]

I'm not complaining. Not really. And have you forgotten I live with one of them. I get to deal with half the ~*~fun~*~ daily.

[ she smiles! and takes the drink. ] Thanks~

Whatever, it's easy enough to do. Once I bothered to buy the stupid skill, anyway.

Do you know how to make drinks without it?

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