LECTURE LIVE

[rugpull]

Who: Idols of all sorts
Where: Hotel Lobby
When: Day 476, morning

[some new idol, some idiot hyena furry idk. He's from Pep Pep? And he's hitting the live button and--]

HEY idols m'new here and the first order of business is t'make some cash so here it is. My name is Shandy cuz why the heck not I guess and this is m'lecture live. And my lecture is this--apparently some of you guys wake up in the morning, slam a clown nose on yer face with a resounding honk, and choose death not cuz of I GUESS WE PLAY DEATH GAMES HERE BY FORCE but cuz death games ya just WANNA do? You just WANNA fight to the death and then apparently I GUESS m'unit glues ya back together?

I dunno, man. I just got here and seems like necromancy is on the menu. So don't just go dyin' on people for laughs and pride.

Unless ya got a big ol' tip waiting for the Pep servicin' ya! In which case call on me and this Shandy'll be right there to help out all the well paying clowns without a single comment about how much yer clown makeup is running down yer face.

Be generous or else uh.

[checks phone for live info notes, squinting]

I dunno, I'll "discipline" ya. Bite ya maybe.

Class now open for questions and I'm now open for preemptive payments into the I Might Die For Clown Reasons fund. Generous payment will be remembered!

Comments

[time5kip]

No, it was just for that one game.

But I mean. We are in hell so taxes wouldn't surprise me.

[rugpull]

I don't remember how to do taxes....

[time5kip]

For a small fee I will help you file your taxes.

[rugpull]

No way! That service is for the lazy!

[time5kip]

Just remember it for the next time a taxes game rolls around.

[rugpull]

No taxation without representation...

[time5kip]

If it makes you feel better, the game had nothing to do with points. It was just a dumb prompt about who pays and who doesn't pay. We had to discover those who didn't.

[rugpull]

OH.

That's fine then long as my points ain't touched.

[time5kip]

Your earnings from resurrecting clowns are probably safe.

[rugpull]

I gotta buy up abilities after this. What kinda powers everyone else got?

[time5kip]

They're different for every Unit so you'll have to check your phone for information. Taisho's can more or less alter reality, under some conditions.

[rugpull]

That sounds pretty wild...

[time5kip]

They are convenient.

But I won't say any more in case, you know. I ever have to kill you in games.

[rugpull]

I'll kill ya first.

[time5kip]

Not likely, but refreshing to hear from a Pep.

[rugpull]

Guess we'll hafta see if it comes up? But I don' wanna die.

[time5kip]

Which is also refreshing to hear from a pep.

[rugpull]

Okay so yer saying something is wrong with 'em.

[time5kip]

Pretty much. Though in fairness your Unit isn't one I pay much attention to, and there has been a change of people, so. Maybe you're not the only reasonable one now.

[rugpull]

I sure hope not or 'll be annoyed.

[time5kip]

... Well. I always thought they were kind of stupid for always getting fucked for some stupid moral crusade but I don't think they won't defend themselves if there's at least one person who objects to potentially dying, so. Make sure you tell them.

[rugpull]

I will.

[time5kip]

Good. Get as many abilities as you can if you haven't gotten them already, as well as a weapon.

Knives are cheap.

[rugpull]

I was counting on m'teeth but I guess a knife probably is the better idea.

[time5kip]

Bullets are expensive, but a gun is a good idea too. Your teeth can also help if you end up in a situation when you are close enough to someone and your hands are tied, so. Not actually useless.