Mingle time!

[heavyliesthecrown]

Who: Idols
Where: Everywhere
When: Day 443; Whenever

[ So I heard we got some newbies. Let's release them into the wild! ]

Comments

[sangreine]

[ She looks at her hand as someone takes it, then her gaze slowly (too slowly) follows his arm up to his face. ]

Happened?

[ She looks fairly out of it. ]

[at_heart]

[ Hates pretty much every part of that, that's for sure! ]

You're all gray again. [ Soft. ] We should get you back to your dorm.

[sangreine]

Oh. [ That's right, she noticed it before. She thinks? Her expression flickers as she tries to bring forth some feeling, but nothing comes. ]

I'm pretty tired. [ So maybe she can just stay here a while? Is that bad? ]

[at_heart]

Hey, no problem. It actually takes almost no energy to be carried.

[ Sliding in close, so that he can get her arm around his shoulder and lift her to her feet. ]

[sangreine]

[ She stands, sluggish but cooperative, then slumps against him. ]

You're always carrying me places.

[at_heart]

[ Soft snort. ]

Don't worry, I'll let you return the favor sometime.

[ Of this he honestly has no doubt. It's just a matter of time before a game or something else knocks him hard enough on his ass that he needs to be carried, even without things like 'sometimes you just get shrunk' going around.

Up he hoists her, comfortable, so that she can maybe get her arms around his neck if she wants, but it's totally optional. Princess carry back to the dorms. ]

[sangreine]

Oh. Okay.

[ Entirely flat and lifeless. No arms around his neck either, she just lays there, still and quiet. Complete contrast to her normal restless exuberance. ]

[at_heart]

[ Yeah, no kidding. It knocks his smile down a notch or two, as much of an improvement as carrying her is on his Can't Stay Warm BS. ]

...Any idea how this happened? [ Maybe she's a skosh more — awake now...? Probably not, but. ] If the fans are back in town, it's definitely news to me.

[sangreine]

...hm?

[ She hadn't fallen asleep, just isn't processing very quickly. ]

Dia said something about not sleeping in the dorm enough...?

[at_heart]

[ He's genuinely blank for a few seconds, then he starts to frown. —The last time he slept in ZRAEL's dorm might've been that first night with Venti...? But. ]

...Yeah, that's. This is a thing that can happen, if we don't...

[ Lets that sentence trail all the way off. He might be kicking himself. ]

They didn't warn you?

[sangreine]

This never happened before. [ And, as he knows at least some of, she is often not in her own bed. ]

[ She looks up at him, inhaling a touch sharply, looking as alarmed as she can be right now -- which is to say, mildly. ] You're not taking me to my room, are you?

[at_heart]

[ Yeah, he's irritated with himself for not thinking about this. It isn't that he hadn't noticed, but he was so sure she must've just been sleeping in her dorm on some of the other nights. ] [ And. Uh. ]

—How about... we start with the lobby. And you tell me what's wrong with your dorm?

[ Gently, but. This isn't like Kit asking not to be sent back to sIV with an injury. She will start disappearing if she stays out here, and...

...and yeah. Someday, he's going to find someone outside the hotel who wants to disappear, but that's not what this is. Right? ]

[sangreine]

[ She had been, until recently, going back to the dorm every so often, enough to hold this off. But then. ]

With the dorm...? Nothing.

[ It's not the dorm, it's her room. And she knew it was ridiculous which is why she didn't say anything, but she can't feel shame or embarrassment now, so. ]

[at_heart]

...with your room, then.

[ He's both relaxing and not relaxing. Because it's better that it's not the whole dorm, better for her, but also... maybe more personally concerning. ]

[sangreine]

It reminds me of something I don't want to remember.

[ A little pause as she waits for a flood of unpleasantness that doesn't come. So, okay. ]

The person who said they were afraid of me. [ Yeah, that. ]

[at_heart]

[ —Damn. Lupine struggles with himself for a few seconds, then sighs softly. ]

Sorry. [ Beat. Offers, with a crooked smile, ] —Think it'd help to redecorate?

[sangreine]

I tried that. Caeli won me a bunch of plushies.

[ What, you thought she'd take a joke? ]

I told them things I never thought I'd admit to anyone. [ Subject whiplash, courtesy of sofaform ]

[at_heart]

[ Chews the inside of his cheek for a few seconds. ]

That's — hard.

[sangreine]

Yeah.

[ a few beats ]

They seemed pretty freaked after watching that one memory, so I was trying to let them know I understand, that I'm angry too and I'd want to see the person who did all that suffer for it. It didn't help. [ This is the slowest, sleepiest rambling ever. ]

I should really stop talking to people when I'm upset, because another time I was mad at someone else and I blurted out -- [ you'll want to interrupt this before it really gets uncomfortable -- yes, it gets worse. Of course it does. ]

[at_heart]

[ Look, he doesn't mind hearing uncomfortable things, but he doesn't love the idea that she'll regret it later. So, cutting her off: ]

Hold that thought.

[ Beat. ]

At least until you're feeling more like yourself, and you know whether or not you actually want to tell me whatever you were about to say.

[sangreine]

...Oh. That makes sense.

[ Hmm, she doesn't know how to interpret being stopped because what are feelings ]

Is it so bad, what I said? [ The one she already coughed up, about wanting to suffer for slaughtering a whole village of people plus a squad of soldiers. ]

[at_heart]

[ His expression flickers, thinking over the exact words she said, and then Lupine pauses. ]

...When you say 'the person who did that should suffer', you mean you, don't you.

[sangreine]

Yeah.

[ She tenses, like she knows she should be upset about this. ]

Is that so wrong? Given what I did.

[at_heart]

[ Pushes out a slow, soft breath. ]

I mean, I don't know about wrong. Seems unfair to me, but — it's not my memory. I can't tell you how to feel about it.

[ ...He needs to get her inside soon, but Lupine hesitates to actually enter the hotel just yet. ]

—Can't speak for the person you were talking to, either, and I realize it might not be easy for you to really put yourself in anyone else's shoes right now, but... can you try to imagine something for me?

[sangreine]

It seems exactly fair. I made them suffer.

[ But, okay. She shrugs as best she can while being carried. ] Okay, I'll try.