maybe your memories will be... better...?

[softlyfalling]

Who: all y'all
Where: wheremstever you want to take memories
When: Day 354

[ decent odds your memories will be better than what's been going on around here, right ]

Comments

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[crossmyheartandhope]

[Off they go, to the dorms. The bird is very warm, and very fluffy, and it doesn't take them long at all]

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[bondsofsuffering]

[Thanks birb.

He's silent the whole way up to the sIV dorms, but hey, his room actually has... well, more room now, even if it's still rather bare and empty of anything to put on the shelves. That's something.]

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[crossmyheartandhope]

...man. Did some spring cleaning, huh?

[Getting him in and settled]

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[bondsofsuffering]

[Locking the door with his phone before sitting on the edge of the bed.]

...Guess so. Levi made me promise to get a personalized room before he left. It just went through.

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[crossmyheartandhope]

It looks nice.

Probly gonna need some stuff to fill it up, though.

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[bondsofsuffering]

Fanmail stuff, maybe. He didn't like how impersonal my room was before.

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[crossmyheartandhope]

Sometimes you need a nice place to go.

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[bondsofsuffering]

That's kind of what the other upgrades are for.

[A smile, but it's rather devoid of life.]

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[crossmyheartandhope]

Well... now you got one more good place.

[Nudges him a little, gentle]

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[bondsofsuffering]

Guess so. We'll see how much I use it.

[Not like he needs to sleep... But also, nudged. Looking over, a little questioning.]

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[crossmyheartandhope]

...you wanna talk about it, or you wanna get distracted?

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[bondsofsuffering]

[...Oh.

Looking away again.]

...I don't know. I'm not even...

Do you really want to sit through talk about murder?

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[crossmyheartandhope]

...depends if you think it'll help.

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[bondsofsuffering]

...Might just make things worse. It's pretty horrible.

[He's pretty horrible.]

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[crossmyheartandhope]

...if you don't wanna talk about it, we don't gotta.

Whatever you need.

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[bondsofsuffering]

[Falling silent again. It takes a while before he starts to speak:]

Do you really want to be friends with a guy who would knowingly drive a person into despair until they agreed to die?

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[crossmyheartandhope]

...I wanna be friends with a guy who had the world throw about everything it could at him to make him someone who he wasn't and still kept trying to be better anyway.

Don't forget, dude. I saw your heart.

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[bondsofsuffering]

...That wasn't trying to be better. It was me taking every shitty thing I was made for and putting it to use.

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[crossmyheartandhope]

Maybe right then. But I seen you before then, and after then, and I seen inside you.

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[bondsofsuffering]

...The reason he was suicidal was because he knew if I existed, the plan to save him and the others could never happen. It drove him to try to kill his friends so they could die themselves.

I knew that. So I pushed him harder. If none of us could be saved anyway... it shouldn't matter if I was the one to pull the trigger, right? If he wanted to die anyway... it would be easier, I thought.

[But it wasn't.]

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[crossmyheartandhope]

So you went ahead with it.

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[bondsofsuffering]

Yeah.

Joke's on me, though. He was right. I figured Chrys would either cut his ties with them or kill me for it. I didn't really think he'd sentence us both to isolation as we wasted away.

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[crossmyheartandhope]

...hey.

[Offers his hand, careful]

C'mere.

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[bondsofsuffering]

[He just looks dully at that hand before slowly reaching for it.]

Re: Witnesses OK! cw suicidal ideation/mentions

[crossmyheartandhope]

[Takes it and draws him in, careful, to give him a hug]