Sleepy Sheepy

[nohalation]

Who: Future is Now
Where: Future is Now dorm
When: Day 271

[If you want more sleep, we at least got a proper place for that!]

Comments

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

As we were leaving, I saw a you with blond hair... I think.

[nohalation]

Hmmm...I don’t remember it very well. I guess that was when I was starting to wake up?

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

You don't have a long lost sister, do you?

[nohalation]

Boy, I hope not. If I do, I don't remember her at all.

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

Yes. I'm sure she would have been brought up by now. Even tangentially.

[Which just means...]

So let's talk dreams. For what I heard from the others, there was the throne room, the party, a room with Blue... Red whatever you want to call her now and angels, and then a corpse room.

[nohalation]

Mmmmm. There was also a Dining Room, a Hot Springs, a game room, sheep, and a stage.

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

Were any of these rooms... happy? Is that too high of a bar? Let's go with neutral.

[nohalation]

I think . . . there was an attempt to make them happy. But at the same time, I could only do so much.

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

You're spreading out your efforts too thin.

How about concentrating on one? If you could fix only one of those rooms, what would it be?

[nohalation]

...FiN's room or the party...

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

... What was wrong with FiN?

[nohalation]

It was very nice although the Wild City Couch was there. Underneath all of it were everyone's dead bodies! I'd rather have it so there weren't dead bodies!

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

. . .





[Excuse me.

What was there now?]

[nohalation]

[ur making a face]

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

You know. I shared a dream with someone once. Where they kept reburying the same corpses over and over and over.

And yet they wouldn't stay in the ground.

Do you want to know why that was?

[nohalation]

Why?

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

Because they could never stop feeling guilty about it.

[nohalation]

Ohhhh...

[(unsure)]

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

So.

Why were there dead bodies in FiN? We haven't died in a game for a fairly long stretch of time.

[nohalation]

Hmm. I think . . . it was a reminder? If I tried to save everyone in Imeeji, our unit would take the consequences. I do not want that.

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

Those deaths resulted from decisions we made as a unit. You don't bear the brunt of that burden alone.

[nohalation]

I know. But "Dusk of Halation" would have made many decisions on her own, including the decision to try and save everyone in Imeeji. If I was to follow that same path here, I would not be happy.

I am Dusk of Halation, but I am also Angel of Future is Now. In a perfect world, I could save everyone and none of us would have to die for it. Imeeji is not that perfect world. We have to pick and choose who to save and who to die, and sometimes we do not have the choice to protect everyone. Sometimes our choices could hurt each other, too. Sometimes our choices mean that we will die anyway. It has been a while since we died, true, but that does not mean we do not carry those scars still.

But I do not regret it.

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

But you choose to remember it in terms of consequences paid rather than the subsequent times you have saved FiN?

[nohalation]

[taps chin]

Maybe it is both? Because I choose to save FiN, but that means consequences.

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

And is there a way to fix that?