Sad Peps Club House

[wonderlandgirl]

Who: Peps + (Un)invited Guests
Where: pep!pep! dorm
When: Day 129, Afternoon

[So, uh.

[Those were certainly some decisions we all made back there. Yup.

[Anyone for tea?]

Comments

Re: also day 130 sometime

[puzzlers]

[ he emerges from the theater looking worse for wear to quickly abduct her. ]

I’m sorry I didn’t hear the door. [ murmurs under his breath as he leads her back into the theater. ]

[rollplayinghouse]

[Oh thank god.

She follows him back gratefully, and once they're inside:]

I brought these for you.

[Holds out the container with a few chocolate eclairs]

[puzzlers]

[ he stares at the container, reaching out to take it, his eyes finally lifting to meet maki's. ]

T- Thank you, Maki, this was very kind of you. [ blinks away a few tears. ] I appreciate it.

[rollplayinghouse]

...No problem.

I'd still like to talk, but... if it's a bad time it can wait.

[puzzlers]

About what, specifically.

[rollplayinghouse]

How you're fully capable of helping people you care about without dying.

[an attempt at tact was made]

[puzzlers]

We won’t ever be playing like that again.

[ it’s appreciated, but he’s so worn down that even if there was more bite to her bark he wouldn’t care. ]

[rollplayinghouse]

...I'm glad to hear that, but that isn't my concern right now.

[puzzlers]

Then what is your concern?

[rollplayinghouse]

That you don't feel like you're incapable of doing anything good because this one thing was bad.

[puzzlers]

It’s not just this. [ he sets the container of pastries down onto one of the seats as he drops into another. ] I feel like each and every time that I try I make it worse… be it here or back home. I- I’m hurting him time and time again and, in turn, hurting myself. [ so… she’s kind of nailed it on the head. ] I don’t know how to stop fucking up.

[rollplayinghouse]

...

[sits down in the other seat beside him]

So you need to figure it out. That's exactly what I wanted to talk about.

You compared it to my live, and it's just like that. That's how I felt. I hurt people back home, I hurt people in the game, and even so, Intensity was still hurt. I wanted to at least help him, and I was fine sacrificing my reputation to do it... but it was a stupid idea and just made things worse. Hurt him more when he really needed help.

[puzzlers]

It doesn't feel like there's a surefire way to really help. If I die, then he's hurt. If he dies, then I'm hurt. And everybody's got to go through with this. A- And then there's more! If our friends die and we live we're both hurting. And if we die and they live, then they're presumably hurting. No matter what... there's always somebody that's going to get hurt...

[ and he hates that so much. ] I know that's the nature of the beast, but... [ it's starting to wear him thin. ]

I... [ he grows tense. ] I told him not to look after me anymore. If it would make things easier during the game to not have to worry, then... [ swallows. ] I- It's not like we can't always help each other afterwards. [ he feels so dead inside right now. ]

[rollplayinghouse]

Of course there isn't a "surefire" way to help. Things aren't that easy. And sometimes there isn't anything you can do, and someone is going to get hurt no matter what.

But that doesn't mean you can't still try, and it doesn't mean it won't help, some other times. The problem with this game wasn't that either you or him had to die and you picked you and he didn't let you. The problem was that you decided you weren't even going to try to get through it with both of you alive. This wasn't like the balloon game, where half the units had to die no matter what. If the points had balanced out more, no one would have died. You sabotaged yourself.

I know it's hard, to keep feeling like there's anything you can do when you've messed up a lot, and when sometimes there just isn't. Like... in the princess game. But I'm here to tell you you can still make a difference.

[puzzlers]

[ he feels his chest tighten as a swell of feelings hit him a lot harder than he'd been expecting. you picked you and he didn't let you. that' the long and short of it, and he hates himself for putting king in that position. ]

[ he nods his head, his eyes closing as he processes the last of what she'd said. ] I'm going to do better next time. I haven't given up, and this misstep is just something I'm going to have to learn from, but I don't want to let anybody down like that again. [ he'll find a way to make a difference. ]

[rollplayinghouse]

Okay. Good.

...Then... is there anything I can do to help?

[puzzlers]

You're already doing plenty, Maki, thank you.

[ he's going to lean over and give her a brief hug. ]

I needed this.

[rollplayinghouse]

[She's still a bit awkward as she hugs back, but seems less unsure of herself.]

Mm. If I could help at all, I'm glad.

[puzzlers]

[ he sits back and wipes the remainder of the tears away. ]

Like I said I definitely needed to hear this. Getting an outside perspective was important. And thanks for the sweets too.

[rollplayinghouse]

...Anytime. I do like being able to make things for people.

[puzzlers]

Is there anything I can do for you?

[rollplayinghouse]

What? Me? I'm fine...

[puzzlers]

Mm! Is there anything I can do to, ah, help... since things had been pretty rough on everybody. [ he reaches for the container she brought and moves it into his lap. ] I don't know if you have anywhere else to be, but if you'd like to watch a movie, maybe unwind or something, ...

[rollplayinghouse]

[Day 130 timeline is a disaster so WHO KNOWS if she has somewhere else to be. But...]

...A movie could be nice.

[puzzlers]

[ day 130 is the day we all get to bend space and time. ]

[ perks up at that. ] We have a huuuuge library of movies. Mostly, ah, horror, no surprise there, but we've also got a bunch of other, older stuff. [ brings up a list on his phone for her to take a peek at. ]

Did you want something to drink? Maybe some tea to go with these? [ lifts up the container. ]