LIVE

[afailedmurder]

Who: A & u
Where: The lobby
When: Day 58, early afternoon

[A's hanging out downstairs, looking sparkly and handsome and wizardy]

Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen. I have an important thing to tell everyone: It turns out that all of your fortunes are the same today. Anyone who comes out and counters this live that I'm doing right now with one of their own will have an enjoyable time of it.

A rather rudimentary prediction for a prognosticator of my ability, I know, but it can't be helped; I am only a messenger for the powers that be. But please, if you disagree with my fortune or feel this live is not up to AlcheME! standard, feel free to come and prove me wrong. I'll be here all afternoon.

Comments

[afailedmurder]

Well, it would have to be more likely than can be reasonably predicted via statistical means. I'm flattered you think that an enjoyable time is an almost guaranteed result, but that's hardly an objective assessment, is it? Do you have the numbers on hand?

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

You throw a counter-live, you get points. Points are money. Money buys happiness - or basic goods in Idol Hell. Does that not equate to an enjoyable time?

As for an actual number, that's difficult to calculate since the fortune itself can skew the probability of it occurring. Let's say you told me I would meet a stranger with green eyes that would alter the course of my future. Wouldn't I then be on the lookout for people with green eyes and therefore, the fortune becomes true because I'm fucking with the odds.

[afailedmurder]

You could interpret it that way, but that wasn't my intended meaning when I made the prediction.

That's true. Though you know, self-fulfilling prophecy is a normal part of fortunetelling tradition. Have you ever had the chance to delve into Greek mythology?

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

Have my hands full dealing with Heaven and Hell bullshit first.

[afailedmurder]

Fair enough. Though I don't find it to be a total waste of time, as Christianity did crib a number of notes from older faiths. But I digress! My point is, self-fulfilling prophecy is an accepted and expected part of the fortunetelling practice.

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

Accepted by who? Is there a fortune teller council? Can I go file a fucking complaint?

[afailedmurder]

Shall I connect you with our customer service?

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

[Just laughs at that]

How is good ol' F doing? Still eating the mail?

[afailedmurder]

Healthy and energetic, as usual. If we forget to shrink her down, those teeth are a menace to more than just the mail. But fortunately most of our furniture is crystal and thus uninteresting for chewing.

[talking about F like somebody else might talk about their kid]

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

[Of course he does]

The fuck. How often do you make her a monster rabbit?

[afailedmurder]

Me personally? Only a few times a week.

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

. . .

Why?

[afailedmurder]

A wizard never reveals his secrets.

[aren't you glad you gave him this eye so he can wink at you obnoxiously]

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

[So. glad]

I see it didn't take you long to get used to the new eye.

[afailedmurder]

Thanks to your excellent craftsmanship.

[taps his temple]

[bluescreenwhitedragon]

[Too late to get in flipping off the camera, but he will look pretty annoyed in the picture regardless]

Only the best for my employees.