!!! ??? !!!

[idolpro]

Who: Nemesis, Hurricane, you!
Where: ?Somewhere?
When: Day 496

[ The sound of an engine roars through the city, unfamiliar to any of you. What is that—? That thing, flying in the sky—Is it a bird? Is it a plane? Or—

Is it a giant mech adorned with naginatas and a shield, flying through Tokyo-F at great speed? Is it Hurricane and Nemesis, coming to say their goodbyes? Or is it the sound of their departure. . . ? ]

Comments

[crossmyheartandhope]

Well, I ain't planning on leaving anyone for good.

[He gives Izanagi's hand a squeeze, as they head down the hall]

So I guess nothing's wrecked yet.

[bondsofsuffering]

[He doesn't respond to that comment, continuing to follow behind him.]

So, got something you need me to work on after you go, or...?

[Having something to work on might be nice. Can't bother thinking about everything else sucking if you're busy.]

[crossmyheartandhope]

[Another soft pulse of uncertainty mingled with guilt, at that response (at the lack thereof), but he covers it over, mostly, keeping up a steady stream of warmth and affection]

Everything I've thought of doing, I already tried. But... I figured someone oughtta have what we found. Y'know?

[bondsofsuffering]

[Sensing that, he sends along affection of his own - even if it's stained by grief even still.]

It'd be a shame to lose all that hard work, huh?

[crossmyheartandhope]

Might help you out, when --

Well. It might help you out, is all.

[He opens up the door to their room and lets them both in]

[bondsofsuffering]

[...Ahh, he's really fucked things up, hasn't he?

That grief now mingles with anxiety and shame and self loathing, too emotionally raw to conceal any of them even a little bit.]

...Yeah. Guess so.

[crossmyheartandhope]

[There's a strong, brief ache of something, at that -- and then, all at once, a surge of reassurance, rough and sudden as a tidal wave]

[It's aching, and it's raw around the edges, and the insistance that Izanagi didn't do anything wrong presses out, messy and insistent, along with the affection that's still there, blanketed warm and soft around Izanagi's shoulders]

Dude -- don't. It ain't --

None of this is on you.

[bondsofsuffering]

[Even buffeted by the reassurance, his own emotions merely twist under the onslaught, writhing and surrounded but still very much there.]

Even if it's not my fault, I can't even cheerfully send you off. You're duty-bound to save others... it was the same with Ayumu.

But even if it's happening again, I still can't bring myself to accept it. And even if you say you'll find me, I can't bring myself to believe in it. Isn't that just too cruel? You're doing everything right, but I still...

[He's still a hopeless mess, giving into the despair that's just too easy to come by.]

[crossmyheartandhope]

[There's a soft swell of -- something, at that. Some wordless ache, and Hurricane ducks his head a little -- holds onto Izanagi's hand a little tighter]

You're just doing what's natural. It ain't -- easy, when somebody goes. It hurts.

And you been hurt before, by a whole lot of people.

[That warmth presses closer -- a sort of heartsick love, tucking in around him]

[bondsofsuffering]

You say that like you aren't being hurt in the same way.

[Even as much of a mess as he is now, he can tell - can still be concerned for Hurricane.]

[crossmyheartandhope]

Well -- sure. But I'm doing it, ain't I?

[Apology swells out, stronger than all the rest, very soft]

[bondsofsuffering]

Because it's what has to happen for you to do the right thing.

[It just...

sucks to be the "wrong option," too.]

[crossmyheartandhope]

Because I can't stand the thought of leaving anybody like that.

[He pauses; something aching and sick with horror wells up, the longer the pause goes on, as he struggles to find the words]

There ain't... nothing there.

It's like -- before. I can't leave him like that.

[bondsofsuffering]

I know. That's why I said - you're doing the right thing.

[Even if it's painful.]

[crossmyheartandhope]

...hey.

[Reaches out to tug him close, again]

C'mere.

[bondsofsuffering]

[Allowing himself to be tugged, needy and feeling rotten for it.]

[crossmyheartandhope]

[He brings his hands up, gently cupping Izanagi's face]

[He takes a shaky breath in]

I love you so much.

And I'm so lucky I got to meet you.

[bondsofsuffering]

[He places a hand over Hurricane's, closing his eyes and pressing his head against Hurricane's, if he's able.]

Hey... shouldn't I be the one saying that?

[crossmyheartandhope]

Naw. Cause I'm luckier.

[bondsofsuffering]

You're the one who let me be human, Hurricane.

[And there's an ache of gratitude too big to contain at that.]

[crossmyheartandhope]

[His eyes well up, at that. One of his thumbs brushes over Izanagi's cheek, very soft; the answering swell of affection is warm, and full, and bittersweet]

Naw. You woulda done that even without me.

I just got to be around to see it.

[bondsofsuffering]

[He presses his face into Hurricane's hand.]

Don't underestimate yourself, my little Jay.

There weren't many people I could share normal interests with like you.

[crossmyheartandhope]

I just ain't underestimating you.

I seen how strong you are, dude. You woulda found a way, for sure.

[bondsofsuffering]

Not with someone who saw the real me - in my heart.

[Because opening up was - and still is - such a painful thing.]

But even knowing that, you treated me as a friend. ...I really was excited when I realized I could be a friend to you too, you know?

[crossmyheartandhope]

You're a real good friend.

A real good boyfriend, too.