MEMORIESSSS

[wotanon]

Who: Idols
Where: Wherever
When: Day 449

[ Time to remember. ]

Comments

Re: day 450, witness ok, cws: nonsexual coercion, torture, murder, enslavement

[gravitydefier]

[to himself] Desire is the root of suffering. [very Buddhist. Zhongli would probably recognize it.

and then after a long moment.]

...I don't know what...

[what he wants, he means.]

Re: day 450, witness ok, cws: nonsexual coercion, torture, murder, enslavement

[leaveofabsence]

What your old master did to you was a terrible thing. I thought - perhaps selfishly - that it would be a mercy to not have to live under such a weight even if it was only for a short time.

I had not imagined the cruelty with which they would return such memories to you.

If you need more time for yourself, here I will wait for you. If you wish for company, here I will stay.

If you wish for me to make that choice for you, know that I attempt to do so with your best interest in heart.

Re: day 450, witness ok, cws: nonsexual coercion, torture, murder, enslavement

[gravitydefier]

...I repeated that sin. [he means of killing while under external influence.] Is it cruelty to remember now?

[and let's not address literally any of the rest of it about his best interest or his trauma or anything like that.]

Re: day 450, witness ok, cws: nonsexual coercion, torture, murder, enslavement

[leaveofabsence]

Isn't that the cruelty of it? To pick at a wound while it is still fresh and yet to mend.

Re: day 450, witness ok, cws: nonsexual coercion, torture, murder, enslavement

[gravitydefier]

[is it cruelty if he deserves it?]

...perhaps it was necessary for me to know, now.

Re: day 450, witness ok, cws: nonsexual coercion, torture, murder, enslavement

[leaveofabsence]

And why would you think that?

Re: day 450, witness ok, cws: nonsexual coercion, torture, murder, enslavement

[gravitydefier]

...given what I did?

Re: day 450, witness ok, cws: nonsexual coercion, torture, murder, enslavement

[leaveofabsence]

I will not object to you wishing to take responsibility for your actions. That is a path that you alone must walk.

But I will not condone you thinking that you deserve cruelty.

Re: day 450, witness ok, cws: nonsexual coercion, torture, murder, enslavement

[gravitydefier]

[just kind of going to stare at the ground.

of course he is going to take responsibility. but the rest of it??]

Re: day 450, witness ok, cws: nonsexual coercion, torture, murder, enslavement

[leaveofabsence]

Come sit with me. For a little while.

Re: day 450, witness ok, cws: nonsexual coercion, torture, murder, enslavement

[gravitydefier]

[after a long moment, comes down from the tree.]

Re: day 450, witness ok, cws: nonsexual coercion, torture, murder, enslavement

[leaveofabsence]

[ He waits patiently, with hands folded in his lap to see if Xiao will come sit next to him. ]

Re: day 450, witness ok, cws: nonsexual coercion, torture, murder, enslavement

[gravitydefier]

[he does, if...awkwardly.]

Re: day 450, witness ok, cws: nonsexual coercion, torture, murder, enslavement

[leaveofabsence]

Do you wish to talk about what happened at the last game?

Re: day 450, witness ok, cws: nonsexual coercion, torture, murder, enslavement

[gravitydefier]

....[after a very long moment.]

I failed to stay alive, [of course he puts it like that, as his failing a duty!] and then I...lost my mind.

Re: day 450, witness ok, cws: nonsexual coercion, torture, murder, enslavement

[leaveofabsence]

Do you believe you had a choice in the matter?

Re: day 450, witness ok, cws: nonsexual coercion, torture, murder, enslavement

[gravitydefier]

I don't understand what difference that would make.