Mingle time!

[heavyliesthecrown]

Who: Idols
Where: Everywhere
When: Day 443; Whenever

[ So I heard we got some newbies. Let's release them into the wild! ]

Comments

[sangreine]

...Oh. That makes sense.

[ Hmm, she doesn't know how to interpret being stopped because what are feelings ]

Is it so bad, what I said? [ The one she already coughed up, about wanting to suffer for slaughtering a whole village of people plus a squad of soldiers. ]

[at_heart]

[ His expression flickers, thinking over the exact words she said, and then Lupine pauses. ]

...When you say 'the person who did that should suffer', you mean you, don't you.

[sangreine]

Yeah.

[ She tenses, like she knows she should be upset about this. ]

Is that so wrong? Given what I did.

[at_heart]

[ Pushes out a slow, soft breath. ]

I mean, I don't know about wrong. Seems unfair to me, but — it's not my memory. I can't tell you how to feel about it.

[ ...He needs to get her inside soon, but Lupine hesitates to actually enter the hotel just yet. ]

—Can't speak for the person you were talking to, either, and I realize it might not be easy for you to really put yourself in anyone else's shoes right now, but... can you try to imagine something for me?

[sangreine]

It seems exactly fair. I made them suffer.

[ But, okay. She shrugs as best she can while being carried. ] Okay, I'll try.

[at_heart]

[ He still doesn't agree with you that you were fully in control of yourself — you seemed so out of it, almost spellbound, and without more context he's inclined to blame the guy in the suit — but he knows that's a losing argument. ]

Thanks, I appreciate it.

[ Smallest beat. ]

If I said to you, "I want to suffer," do you think you'd find that comforting?

[sangreine]

[ She thinks for a long moment. ]

Probably not comforting. But it would matter what you were talking about.

[at_heart]

Are you sure about that?

[ Gently, for all that gentleness probably doesn't matter to her right now. ]

What if this other person said it? Even after they told you they'd done something horrible. You really care about them, don't you? [ Smallest pause. ] We tend to not want the people we care about to suffer, even if it might be just.

[sangreine]

Of course it's not what I'd want for them. But if I care about them I can't just say they're wrong for what they're feeling.

[ This is very Kitsu-related, in case anyone perceptive is seeing massive overlap there. ]

[at_heart]

[ Well, it certainly reminds him of what's been going on with Kit enough for Lupine's expression to sour, but he cinches his eyes shut and focuses. ]

Did they? Tell you you were wrong for feeling like that, I mean.

[sangreine]

Pretty much. Basically it couldn't have gone worse.

But I wanted to know if they could handle everything with me and now I guess I know.

[at_heart]

Hey.

[ Ducks his head to meet her eyes. ]

If they can't, they're missing out.

[sangreine]

If you say so. [ Very much unconvinced, but also doesn't have the energy to argue. ]

Between this and that second memory I got, I didn't want to be by myself. Which is the other reason I wasn't staying in my room.

[at_heart]

[ His smile shifts, then his gaze slips away. Well, it was between saying that and hoping that maybe Zari had misinterpreted what this person (maybe Nemesis, maybe Zari's so fantastically unlucky that she's had two heartbreaks in her short time in Imeeji) was saying, or that they come around. Swing and a miss. ]

Well, there's nothing wrong with wanting company. We just have to find you someplace in your dorm that you don't mind sleeping right now.

[sangreine]

[ Usually she'd at least act cheered up, if only for show, but right now she can't do that and she can't actually be happy, so you get cold hard reality, which is that she thinks people have a very good reason to be afraid of her. ]

The stormy room, I guess. The garden plants are all poisonous so it's not the best idea to sleep there.

[at_heart]

[ That's fine, honestly? He can handle knowing when he hasn't cheered her up at all. Besides, with the gray, it was definitely to be expected. ]

...I could definitely clear you a safe space to sleep in the garden, but. Yeah, stormy room sounds better.

[ Especially given there are good memories in the stormy room. ] [ Wh, why a garden entirely of poisonous things. ]

[sangreine]

[ Because ​☆Zrael, silly ][ There are good memories in the stormy room indeed, but also some less than great ones that are more recent; nothing so terrible, however, that she's avoiding it. ]

Dia doesn't want me in the garden without protective gear on. I tried telling her I'm probably immune and I can dodge anything in there anyway, but she insists and I don't want to go around her. [ Longwinded way of saying no on the garden. ] She's going to be mad about this, so I don't want to make it worse.

[at_heart]

[ But ENTIRELY? ]

She's going to be mad? —About the graying?

[sangreine]

Probably. She tried to warn me, but I didn't really understand the words she was using. And I think she didn't like that I didn't want to be around the dorm.

She's a really good person, though, so I shouldn't be around her very much anyway.

[at_heart]

[ ...Zari. ]

Well — if you were my unitmate, I'd definitely be bummed that our dorm makes you uncomfortable. I'd wanna do whatever I could to help out.

[ For example, he will definitely not be getting a dog anytime soon, because WWX is afraid of them. ]

[sangreine]

She already does so much. The other day she was sick and wouldn't rest because she was busy taking care of everyone. I don't want her to think she has to do anything different, especially when none of this is her fault.

[at_heart]

[ mrrrr ]

Well... is there anything I can do?

[ Softly. ]

[sangreine]

Nothing that I want to ask you for.

[at_heart]

Funny, that sounds frustratingly like a 'yes'.

[sangreine]

I can't lie right now, I guess. But I can still remember that there's a reason I didn't ask you before.