imeeji_frontstage | (no subject)

[ It's very true that seeing Alisaie and her brother makes Aliza's head ache for whatever reason, but whatever mess is jumbled up inside her memory-locked brain it doesn't mean that she doesn't care. Hearing Alisaie cry out like that and having gotten a huge taste of being brushed off herself, she decides that her damn head can just hurt, she's not doing that to someone else. ]

[ (She does not watch the memories, quite on purpose. It's not her business unless people tell her freely.) ]

Hey, careful. [ With the earring, with memories, all of it. ]

Sorry. Sorry, Alizarin.

[Deep breath.

[Calm yourself.]

I know I shouldn't fidget with it so.

I wasn't scolding. I'd have done worse.

[ Very gently resting her fingertips on Alisaie's head, near her ear. Everything seems still where it should be. ] I just don't want you any more hurt because of that thing.

Of all the times to remember that. No wonder they were so very co-operative about finishing the story.

[Her fingers still against Aliza's arm. At least it's something else to do.]

The timing here is impeccable, isn't it? [ Speaking softly to match her touch, because she gets it. The vertigo and emotional whiplash of memories you thought you wanted. That's why she still only has the one. ]

I'm sorry I can't do more to help. [ Just very acutely aware of how useless she is in these matters. ]

Oh, matchless. I can only imagine someone must be picking and choosing what we recall when. I had hoped it was mere chance.

[This feels far beyond it. It's too pointed to be chance.]

Please don't apologize. You're here, aren't you?

Yeah. They're playing with us, same as always.

[ She has the decency to look abashed at the mention of being here, at least. ] Alisaie, I'm sorry I was short after the last game. Inside Zhongli's game I saw an image of you and your brother together, and something inside me burst open. I can't remember why, of course, and it's not your fault either way.

[But something in Alizarin remembers, very well.

[She's grateful for the explanation.]

And you've no way to find out what, save 'buy dozens of memories with points you may not have, and hope one of them deigns to explain it eventually and that it isn't too awful when it does'...

They've got a perfect racket going here, haven't they? Take our selves away from us. Make us pay to get them back. And you can't pay without points, and you don't get enough points for even a single memory from a game you don't win, and you can't win the games without humiliating yourself, or spilling blood--Gods, I hate them!

[ Hearing it put so concisely, the truth laid bare, makes it even more infuriating -- but Aliza isn't going to let herself get furious, because that's not the most important thing she's doing, here and now. ]

[ Aware she might be overstepping but not especially caring, she gently puts her arms around Alisaie, so long as she's not brushed off (and if so, she'll understand). This place can bust her head wide open if it wants to, but she's not going to let them tell her who to care about or when. ]

I do, too.

[She tenses, momentarily, then slumps against her, leaning into the embrace.]

Thank you.

[I needed that.

[Both of those things.

[Mayhap she never doubted that the others would feel the same way, but it's always a comfort, to hear it put into words. To not simply have to assume any more.]

Mn, I wish there was more I could do. [ Just stilling for the moment, letting Alisaie relax a bit, trying to be there in ways she's normally not so great at, but is working on. ]

They might make us fight each other sometimes, but they can't tell us who to care about or when. They can't stop us from helping each other. It's not a lot, maybe not enough, but it's something. Right?

No. You're right.

[Deep breath.]

I won't let them do that. If they take even that away from us all - what do we have left?

[ It feels so unspeakably good to actually be of help to someone. ]

Exactly. Where I'm from there's a saying, the best revenge is living well. Not that I wouldn't love a shot at them, mind you.

[ Rubbing Alisaie's back just a little, and very slowly pulling back. ] I'm counting on you to remind me of this next time they get to me.

The most satisfying revenge is definitely taking a shot at them.

[She rests a hand on Aliza's, as she pulls back.]

But I'll do my best to remember that. For both of us.

I couldn't agree more, on both counts.

[ Squeezing that hand, gently ] But it's okay to get upset about it too, I get it. You're letting people comfort you, which is better than I usually manage.

Oh, that's only because I like you.

[It's out before she can stop it, but she doesn't regret it.]

[ She looks a bit thrown for a second, then her smile shifts, now free of anything like sympathy or concern, just purely delighted. ]

Well then, I'm glad. I like you, too.

And I'm glad to hear that, too.

[I thought you were angry with me, she doesn't say: that much Alizarin has already covered. Some other half-remembered thing she's going to have to spin the wheel for--]

Thank you. For telling me why you were upset, as well.

Good. [ Whatever upset her so, it seems well worth ignoring. ]

You deserve better than to have me upset over something you had nothing to do with. I don't want to let my past control what I do any more than I want the Producers controlling it.

(no subject)

Re: cw: suicide; witness ok; endwalker spoilers

Re: cw: suicide; witness ok; endwalker spoilers

Re: cw: suicide; witness ok; endwalker spoilers

Re: cw: suicide; witness ok; endwalker spoilers

Re: cw: suicide; witness ok; endwalker spoilers

Re: cw: suicide; witness ok; endwalker spoilers

Re: cw: suicide; witness ok; endwalker spoilers

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