Sad Peps Club House

[wonderlandgirl]

Who: Peps + (Un)invited Guests
Where: pep!pep! dorm
When: Day 129, Afternoon

[So, uh.

[Those were certainly some decisions we all made back there. Yup.

[Anyone for tea?]

Comments

[malignstar]

I don't think that would look bad, do you?

[puzzlers]

I'm not sure, but we can definitely give it a shot. [ going to sketch keeping that in mind. ]

[malignstar]

[ Just nods and sits back on his heels, rubbing at his necklace charm ]

[puzzlers]

[ it doesn't take him long to finish the sketch, which he turns towards sunshine. ]

I miss her too...

[malignstar]

[ Drops necklace. He wasn't holding the charm Sunset gave them but a thicker stone ]

What?

[puzzlers]

[ oops. he didn't know. ]

Sunset. I, ah, didn't realize you hadn't been holding onto that charm. [ tries to see which one he was holding. ]

[malignstar]

[ It's this ]

What are you talking about?

[puzzlers]

N- Nevermind.

[ he sighs, knocking his head into his pad. ]

Relaxing hasn’t helped me recollect my thoughts as well as I’d hoped. My head is still a big mess...

[malignstar]

Sometimes things to take longer to shake. If you ever do.

[puzzlers]

... [ some things haunt you forever. ]

Yeah...

[ clutches his notepad. ] Working through some stuff can be really difficult. [ next to impossible. ]

[malignstar]

And some things can't be worked through. No matter how much you wish they could. The differences are too wide.

[puzzlers]

...

Is something like that bothering you, Sunshine?

[malignstar]

[ Jerks head to the side but truth effect gonna truth ]

... yeah.

[puzzlers]

[ it seems obvious that he doesn't want to talk about it, but... ]

If you feel like you need to get it off your chest let me know. I'd be willing to listen or... maybe we can try to talk through it, depending on what's wrong. [ he looks down at the pad. ]

[malignstar]

[ Draws a circle on the floor with his finger ]

You're already upset. I don't want to make that worse.

[puzzlers]

It's not just about me, Sunshine. It's about you too, so if you have something on your mind I hope you know you can tell me. I don't want you hurting more for my sake...

[malignstar]

... it's not your fault I can't be a good teammate.

[puzzlers]

What are you talking about? You're a great teammate.

[ very concerned now. ]

[malignstar]

[ Scraping at the floor with his nails ]

I wanted to stop you. I wanted it more than anything. It wouldn't have done anything good, but I thought about it... Even knowing how much it would hurt all of you.

And still, I'm furious that I didn't even try. You could have died or worse and I did nothing.

[puzzlers]

[ he sets the pad aside and turns to face sunshine. ]

I'm sorry that I put you through that. Having to choose between people that mean a lot to you is very difficult, impossible, even, but it means a lot... knowing that you wanted to protect us... [ even if he hadn't said anything during the game the sentiment is certainly appreciated now. ]

[ he draws his knees to his chest. ] Truthfully I don't want to see you or the rest of pep! hurt. You guys are like my family and even though not everybody shares the sentiment it's how I feel. There's no easy way to play these stupid games. Someone gets hurt no matter what. Anyway, I'm sorry, Sunshine, that I made things harder for you.

[malignstar]

... I know you want to protect King, that Cobalt wants to protect Thorn, that Wednesday wants to protect Levi, the Rise wants to protect B. I understand. But... you're my team, you're always going to be my priority, no matter how I feel about anyone else on the units.

[ Claws for his charm again ]

I can't... force you to protect yourselves for my sake.

[puzzlers]

[ his shoulders sink inward a bit. ]

I don't think we'll be doing something again. And we should look after each other. Like you said, we're a team.

I think we'll just have to work on finding some sort of a middle ground, so we can all be... ok with how things go. [ "ok". ] I didn't want to hurt anybody and I ended up hurting everybody...

[malignstar]

[ Placing a hand on his, as he other hand falls from his chain ]

... you were just trying to do what you felt was right.

[puzzlers]

...and now I feel like I don't even know what right is. [ he squeezes his hand. ]

[malignstar]

You'll figure it out.