NEWBIE ARRIVES

[darkroastbean]

Who: AlcheWHO?
Where: AlcheMe! Dorms
When: Day 435 /whenever convenient

[uh oh the doors are locked!!!


and hey isn't it weird that C's room didn't disappear? Maybe its because the prop room is connected to it. Whatever the case, some guy is coming stumbling out of the room in his underwear]


What in the--what is all this crap?? What's with all this creepy stuff in that room?!

Comments

[darkroastbean]

Is that also magic?

[doublefried]

I figured I would just use the kitchen.

[darkroastbean]

Oh good. Then yes, yes please.

[GONNA, GONNA READ THIS SHIT]

[doublefried]

[ Welcome To Hell 101. goes and makes some nice soothing tea and comes back ]

It's a little outdated, I think, but we haven't really learned THAT much more since it was last updated.

[darkroastbean]

[honestly just skimmed it only a little since i don't ooc remember shit about it, ON HIS PHONE NOW]

This is seriously all real. . .I didn't sign up for this. What about me screams idol? Or--wizard? You're a wizard?

[doublefried]

This isn't going to sound much less outlandish than 'wizard', but I was actually a professional hero. Still, it's just the unit aesthetic. Think of it kind of like an acting troupe?

[darkroastbean]

What, you mean a cop?

. . .and soooo. Circus. Like I guessed?

[doublefried]

More like an emergency responder? And we do less flips than a circus.

[darkroastbean]

Then what are the wings for? Aesthetic? I'm not wearing those.

[doublefried]

They're part of my body.

[darkroastbean]

Willingly??

[doublefried]

I was born with them!

[darkroastbean]

Are you screwing with me?!

[doublefried]

[ SPREADS THEM OUT ]

You can touch 'em if you want.

[darkroastbean]

[SQUAWKS AND FALLS OFF THE COUCH]

T-they're real--!

[doublefried]

Of course they're real!

[darkroastbean]

That's crazy. . .what the hell. That doesn't hurt?? It's normal? No, wait, stupid question. Is everyone else like that here?

[doublefried]

Is everyone a bird person? No, I'm pretty unique. Some other people have wings but they're fakes.

[darkroastbean]

And what's the etiquette when it comes to gawking? Cuz I think I'm gonna do a lot of gawking.

[doublefried]

You can gawk, but try to do it discreetly.

[darkroastbean]

[LOOKS...AROUND]

You say that and yet it feels like I'm on the LEAST discreet unit??

[doublefried]

You haven't seen the other units.

[darkroastbean]

F..fair. . .[SIGHS]

Okay. Okay! I give. Do I have to sign some sort of shady contract or something? I just wanna get this over with and go home. . .assuming I will remember where that is after I agree to all this.

[doublefried]

No shady contracts! Oh, but we need to get you a name. AlcheME has a bit of a theme. Our current members are Q, Tea, Y, O, and Lark, and I'm W.

[darkroastbean]

. . .

Cue, Tea, Why, Oh, Lark, and--Dubya? [thinks--OH]

Wait, those are English letters and phrases, right? Are you trying to spell something?