[Somebody has a microphone. They're still in their pajamas. They're loudly addressing everybody. Why. Why are they doing thi--]
I am the newest member of ☆ZRAEL!
[Ah. That explains it.]
And I'm here to speak to all of you about a very important purpose. Identity. Self. Purpose. Life. For without one, you have none of the other! You're simply a ghost, wandering through your miserable existence, waiting for the Earth to reclaim you. Now - for most of you, an identity won't help you in that respect, you'll still be a batch of shmucks shuffling aimlessly towards oblivion one way or the other. But for some of us - mostly just those of of us on ☆ZRAEL, I mean - there's an opportunity to be more. To be something. To be great. I am one of those blessed few. A witch of great renown, according to my profile! [She brandishes her smartphone a bit.] And I have no reason to believe it's lying yet. But what is a great witch without a name to inspired awe and fear from all who know it? That's where all of you come in! Yes, you're not dreaming, this is your opportunity to do something meaningful with your lives for once!
You see, as I've just arrived here in beautiful, scenic Tokyo-F, I require two things - points, with which to purchase back my memories and the many, many, many luxuries which I deserve to live with, and a name! And you can contribute both! Would you like to make your indelible mark on history? Simply come up with a name appropriately befitting a witch of my stature and place a bid of your points on it! The highest bidder will win the naming rights, and I will hereby be referred to as whatever you suggest!
Note that if you come up with something silly like "Dickbutt", I reserve the right to take your points and then completely disregard it. The sign-up sheet is right here!
[She has a clipboard with a sign-up sheet announced.]
Come now, don't be shy. Who wants to be the first person to be a part of history!
LIVE - WHAT'S IN A NAME (monologue)
[Somebody has a microphone. They're still in their pajamas. They're loudly addressing everybody. Why. Why are they doing thi--]
I am the newest member of ☆ZRAEL!
[Ah. That explains it.]
And I'm here to speak to all of you about a very important purpose. Identity. Self. Purpose. Life. For without one, you have none of the other! You're simply a ghost, wandering through your miserable existence, waiting for the Earth to reclaim you. Now - for most of you, an identity won't help you in that respect, you'll still be a batch of shmucks shuffling aimlessly towards oblivion one way or the other. But for some of us - mostly just those of of us on ☆ZRAEL, I mean - there's an opportunity to be more. To be something. To be great. I am one of those blessed few. A witch of great renown, according to my profile! [She brandishes her smartphone a bit.] And I have no reason to believe it's lying yet. But what is a great witch without a name to inspired awe and fear from all who know it? That's where all of you come in! Yes, you're not dreaming, this is your opportunity to do something meaningful with your lives for once!
You see, as I've just arrived here in beautiful, scenic Tokyo-F, I require two things - points, with which to purchase back my memories and the many, many, many luxuries which I deserve to live with, and a name! And you can contribute both! Would you like to make your indelible mark on history? Simply come up with a name appropriately befitting a witch of my stature and place a bid of your points on it! The highest bidder will win the naming rights, and I will hereby be referred to as whatever you suggest!
Note that if you come up with something silly like "Dickbutt", I reserve the right to take your points and then completely disregard it. The sign-up sheet is right here!
[She has a clipboard with a sign-up sheet announced.]
Come now, don't be shy. Who wants to be the first person to be a part of history!