[Takes a breath, and looks off to the side as she gathers her thoughts. She sort of gives off the impression she's formulating this answer more for herself than for him.]
I have tried some different things with relationships in my time here. I had two boyfriends, and initially we were open to other people too, if we talked about it first. But... there were some issues. So then we closed it to just us three, until we could work things out better. ...That didn't help, though. Maybe made it worse, because part of the problem was that we all had expectations about what a relationship should be. We're still... kind of friends, but... I broke up with them both a little while ago.
Now I'm involved with someone else who doesn't like calling it a "relationship" at all. But it's fine... because he's still there for me in the ways that matter.
So... I guess, my thoughts are that open or closed doesn't actually change that much, for the relationship. You should be able to tell you're important to someone from how they act toward you, and if you can't, a rule that they can't do certain things with anyone else isn't going to help anything. So it's just a matter of what you want.
For myself... I'm not the sort of person who gets involved with people casually, so it's not like I'm "taking advantage" of it much. I'd be fine if it was an exclusive relationship too. But there are a few other people I like, and... It's kind of nice to just let things be what they are, rather than force them or shut them down.
no subject
[Takes a breath, and looks off to the side as she gathers her thoughts. She sort of gives off the impression she's formulating this answer more for herself than for him.]
I have tried some different things with relationships in my time here. I had two boyfriends, and initially we were open to other people too, if we talked about it first. But... there were some issues. So then we closed it to just us three, until we could work things out better. ...That didn't help, though. Maybe made it worse, because part of the problem was that we all had expectations about what a relationship should be. We're still... kind of friends, but... I broke up with them both a little while ago.
Now I'm involved with someone else who doesn't like calling it a "relationship" at all. But it's fine... because he's still there for me in the ways that matter.
So... I guess, my thoughts are that open or closed doesn't actually change that much, for the relationship. You should be able to tell you're important to someone from how they act toward you, and if you can't, a rule that they can't do certain things with anyone else isn't going to help anything. So it's just a matter of what you want.
For myself... I'm not the sort of person who gets involved with people casually, so it's not like I'm "taking advantage" of it much. I'd be fine if it was an exclusive relationship too. But there are a few other people I like, and... It's kind of nice to just let things be what they are, rather than force them or shut them down.